I remember when I first started programming. I was about 7 years old when my parents brought home our first computer – and I was curious (that’s just the way I was raised). I immediately fell in love with it. Programming the computer just seemed like part of using it. I’m young enough (and I guess old enough?) that at that time the computer had Windows XP. After a short while I swapped out Internet Explorer for Firefox (version 2), and not long after that I was using Ubuntu to get a little bit more control. I fell head over heels in love with free software – the idea that I could use, study, share, and improve software was intoxicating. I was hooked.

I found online forums full of hackers who were all so nice and encouraging. They never made me feel unwelcome, no matter how awful my code was or how silly my questions were. There was no concept of “rank” or “reputation” – everyone was just there to learn and to help. I learned so much from them, and I wanted badly to give back. I felt embarrassed that the only things I could make were simple scripts and web pages. I felt like a little kid watching a bunch of very kind grown-ups hold up the sky. They were writing device drivers, compilers, file systems; they were making sure that all of our computers worked and worked on our terms. I wanted to join them and pitch in, not just reap the benefits of their hard work.

So after a few short years, I got the idea that I’d like to contribute to the kernel. And then I caught a glimpse of the kernel mailing list.

It was not like what I’d gotten used to.

I did not become a kernel developer.

In fact, the meanness and hatred that I saw there put me off of any lower-level programming for a very, very long time. I guess I just have thin skin, I don’t know. I don’t use any social media for the same reason – I just don’t have the stomach for it. It’s just not the way I was raised, to talk to people like that. I hear that the kernel mailing list is doing better now, but I haven’t taken a look.

I made Bash++ because I wanted to. I felt that I had some small need for it, and it seemed like it would be fun. I didn’t expect anyone to take notice, really. That was (and is) absolutely fine with me – I’m not making any money by it, I have no stake in it, I just like doing it. Of course, when someone says to me that they’ve found it useful, that feels amazing.

It’s not like Bash++ has gotten a ton of attention, but it’s gotten some. And I’ve gotten some hateful messages over something that I made and released for free. I get that some people don’t like object orientation, I get that some people don’t like Bash, and I get that some people love both but hate the idea of combining the two. But I’m not selling anything – I’m not asking anyone to use it or even saying that it’s any good.

It’d be pretty silly for me to ask people to not be mean. That’d be a bit like asking the sun not to rise. So I guess that all I want to say is: I forgive you. That’s just the way I was raised.